The Wheel
by MrGrayson24
Summary: A one-shot, documenting the highlights of Dick and Jason's relationship over the years. Yaoi.
Title: The Wheel

Pairing: Dick / Jason – Nightwing / Red Hood

Rating: T

Disclaimer: This is not for profit or DC legit.

Summary: A one-shot, documenting the highlights of Dick and Jason's relationship over the years.

Author's Note: Been out of commission for a while, so I wrote this to get back up and running before I get back to my other projects. I really liked how it turned out and I hope others do too

-x-

"Can you believe him?!" Dick cried.

"It does seem super sudden." Barbara pulled her feet beneath her.

"4 months! 4 months was all it took to find my replacement! _And it's some street kid_! Who looks just like me!"

"Yeah…" Barbara narrowed her eyes. "That part is a little weird."

Dick sighed and dropped on the couch next to Barbara. "I didn't know that by moving on, I would be replaced."

Barbara draped an arm over his shoulders. "I think you're taking this a little hard."

Despite himself, Dick smiled. "What gave you that idea?"

"I know it's not easy but think about it from Bruce's perspective."

"Isn't that all we do around here?"

Barbara faced Dick. "You weren't here after you left. You didn't see what he went through-"

"-What _he_ went through?! Do you know what it was like, living with him?"

"I don't. But when you guys had your falling out, he was…. different. For the first time, I think he was lonely."

Dick opened his mouth to speak but decided better of it. He knew Barbara was trying to help, and everything she said was true, because he'd said it to himself. "Still…" he debated aloud. "Why did he have to choose… what's his name? _Jason._ And they couldn't think of any other code name then Robin?"

-x-

"Go, go, _go, Go, GO!"_ Dick screamed. Jason was only inches ahead of him as they leapt from plank to plank. The gangway of the Gotham sewer had deteriorated years before so all that remained were molded platforms that barely held their weight.

"Yelling isn't going to make me go any faster!" Jason yelled back as a rotted piece of wood crumbled beneath his foot. He stumbled to the next platform and Dick barely made the leap to the plank beyond and they continued to run.

From beneath the murky waters, something moved, waiting to rise from the surface. It had been stupid to follow Killer Croc down here and they had lost him almost immediately. Dick was willing to call the mission over when Killer Croc had reappeared and began his underwater pursuit.

So they ran and tried to keep balance when he would leap from the water to pull them in. It was easier for Dick to stay in the air, even for a few seconds, where as Jason had begun to stumble as the planks beneath his feet gave way.

Then, the seemingly endless tunnel had an end. "Through the door!" Dick pointed ahead and Jason nodded. There was a small stone ledge that worked as the doors landing and Jason hopped to it. When Dick went to jump, his ankle was caught in a vice like grip as a scaly hand tried to pull him into the water.

"Jason!" Dick reached for Jason's outstretched hand. Killer Croc was strong but his angle worked against him. Dick managed to kick his leg free and him and Jason disappeared behind the door and bolted it closed.

"I told you this was a dumb idea!" Jason yelled. The door shook as Killer Croc threw himself against it.

Dick rolled his eyes. "Do you really think this is the time for this?" He pressed against the door but it didn't do much good, the hinges started to break.

Jason crossed to the back of the room. When he returned, he had a small wire that's other end disappeared to the back of the room.

"Where did you get that?" Dick shot at him.

Jason stripped the wires casing. "From the lamp, just give me a minute."

"To do what?!" Dick couldn't believe Jason, sometimes.

"Hold on!" But Jason didn't look up and the door began to splinter.

Dick held firm but Killer Croc's drug induced strength was too much. "What are you doing?! Help me!"

Jason smiled and Dick wasn't annoyed anymore, which annoyed him. But Jason pointed to the crack under the door where the water from Killer Croc's swim had begun to puddle. He held up the wire and it sparked. "You really need to chill out sometimes, Grayson." And he dropped the wire.

-x-

"So, Croc is back at Arkham?" Jason looked over the Gotham skyline.

"Yeah, they said he has a nasty withdraw ahead of him so he's not going to be active for awhile." Dick swung his feet over the side of the rooftops edge as the morning washed over the city. "You did really well today."

"Thanks." Jason smiled. " But I probably could have handled it on my own."

Dick rolled his eyes. "You should learn to take a compliment."

"And you should learn to take a joke." Jason countered. "But… thank _you_ , I guess… for offering-"

"-say no more." Dick held up his hand. "I know more than anyone how important it is to have time away from Bruce."

Jason hummed and nodded but fixed his eyes to the ground. "Yeah… I guess. I thought by now, all of this would be easier. I've been his sidekick for almost a year now and…"

"And what?"

Jason sighed. "And I still feel like I always have to live up to you."

"Jason…"

"It's fine." Jason looked to the horizon. "I used to think, if I could just be as good as you, he would take me seriously. I hated you for being the golden child but… I also don't know what I would have done if you hadn't been there because… I can never be as _good_ as you and because I hated it so much… I never stopped trying."

Dick put an arm around Jason's shoulders and was surprised to find him lean in. "Don't go looking for Bruce's approval. All that's down that road is disappointment, believe me. He holds everyone at a distance and it feels like, if you could just push yourself a little harder, be better, maybe he'll let you in. But he won't. Just be the best you, that'll be enough."

Jason sighed. "Before Bruce found me, I wondered what it would be like to have a Dad." Jason faced Dick. "And now that I have one… I guess I thought I wouldn't be lonely."

Dick pulled Jason close and kissed him. He didn't know why he did it. Maybe it was because he understood everything Jason was going through. Or there was a small part of him that just didn't want to see Jason sad. At first, Dick was worried he'd gone too far. Jason tensed and almost pulled away but then he seemed to melt.

"Sorry." Dick pulled back and looked away, embarrassed. "I don't know where that came from."

Dick knew he could never replace the emptiness Jason felt with a kiss, but for a moment, Jason seemed truly happy.

But Jason chuckled. "It's fine… I liked…" he turned as red as Dick. "Would you want to do another mission tomorrow?"

-x-

Dick's fist connected with the side of Jason's face.

"Again." Dick flexed his fingers and resumed his stance.

Blood trickled from Jason's nose and he wiped it away with the back of his hand. "You're cranky today. Want to talk about it?" He was being sincere, but there was always an air or sarcasm in his voice that Dick usually found endearing.

"When are you going to take this seriously?" Dick threw a left hook. "Do you realize how close you came to getting your head blown off last night?" Jason ducked and countered until they entered their familiar flow.

"I could have handled it!" Jason blocked Dick's foot from lodging in his stomach and pushed the older boy back.

Dick shifted his weight and came back at him "But you didn't!" His blows were relentless. "You keep jumping into situations without thinking and it's going to get you killed!"

With a huge shove, Jason tumbled to the floor. Dick tried to kick him onto his back but Jason stomped on Dick's supporting ankle and he fell down next to him.

"Seems to be working out okay." Jason smiled and kneed Dick in the side. "I'm still alive, aren't I?"

The very thought made Dick's stomach fall. Jason's kick was enough to knock the wind from him and set him on his feet. "And why do you care anyway?" Jason asked as he pressed himself on top of Dick, hands on either side of his head. "Is it because I wouldn't be able to do this anymore?" And he kissed him until Dick had to pull him away.

"Exactly." Dick said sternly. "I _do_ need this. I need _you_."

-x-

"Jason died last night." Bruce reported. "The Joker beat him with a crowbar for hours, until I was finally able to track them at a warehouse. But by the time I got there, he'd blown it up."

Dick's entire world disintegrated beneath him. "What…" Words, even thoughts, failed him. "What did you say?"

"Jason died last night." It felt like a knife. "The wounds we found on his remains-"

"That's enough!" Dick yelled. Then came the tears he had reserved for this moment, but he had hoped he would never have to use them. He collapsed in front of the Batcave's monitor and Bruce knelt before him.

"I know this isn't easy… for either of us." For the first time, Dick saw the look of loneliness on Bruce's face. He wanted to say something to make it better but he knew he wore the same expression. "But we're still a family and we will find a way through this."

-x-

"This is Timothy Drake. He is going to be the new Robin."

Bruce had called Dick to the Batcave with the simple message 'I have news', but somehow, Dick knew. He knew this day would come… eventually, and he'd promised himself he would see it through.

So when Tim came out in the upgraded Robin suit, Dick expected to feel outraged, or sad but… there was nothing. There was no drop, no nausea, no resentment. There was just hope. Hope that someone could get it right this time, tie the Robin name to something other than the night Jason died. And he wanted to make sure he got it right this time, too. He'd be a better mentor than he'd been to Jason, he'd train Tim and help protect him in a way he'd failed to before. He would never love Tim the same way he loved Jason but maybe that was better for both of them. Dick couldn't go through the pain again.

"It's nice to meet you, Tim." He smiled and held out his hand. "I'm Dick Grayson."

-x-

"Okay, if you could have three superpowers, what would they be?" Tim called from the far end of the Batcave.

Dick leaned back in the leather office chair and gulped his beer. "Mmmm, probably Superman's flight, Green Lantern's ring and… Batman's car." They both laughed. "How about you?"

There was no answer. When Dick spun around, Tim stood in front of the glass case with Jason's costume inside. "He never talks about him." Tim commented.

Dick had done his best to never look in that corner of the Batcave. He still thought of Jason, every day, and to hear someone acknowledge his existence felt like a weight being lifted.

"It was… hard." He leaned forward and spun the bottle in his hand. "It took Bruce and me a while to come to terms. Things got better when you came."

Bruce never even mentioned Jason's name anymore, it was like he'd become what he actually was… a memory. It had gotten to the point where Dick wondered if he'd ever been real. But when he looked at the costume now, it was like he'd never left.

"Was he nice?" Tim asked.

"No." Dick laughed. "He was an ass most of the time. Super cocky. Convinced he didn't need any bodies help and didn't admit it when he did."

He leaned back, maybe to look away from the costume, or maybe so Tim couldn't see the hurt in his eyes, and began to peel off the bottle's label. "But he was talented. And smart. The way he fought, it was so… _him_. Brutal and creative." Dick and Tim both smiled. "People didn't come easy for him. _Love_ didn't come easy for him. But I had never met someone who _tried_ to love as hard as he did."

There was a long silence. "You two were involved, weren't you?"

Dick looked up and sighed. "What gave you that impression?"

Tim laughed. "Lucky guess. Did Bruce know?"

"Yeah. I never told him and we never talked about it but… yeah, he knew. He _knows._ "

-x-

A very well informed street dealer had tipped off Dick about where the Red Hood collected his cut of the earnings and tonight was the night he'd finally get to unmask the vigilante.

Perched above the alley, Dick waited and watched and sure enough, before long, a motorcycle appeared at the far end and headed for the center. A shaking figure appeared on the other side and they met in the middle.

The exchange was simple enough and Dick was lucky that the delivery boy was eager to leave. The Red Hood hadn't even finished counting the money when Dick saw his chance.

"Hey asshole!" He swung from the ledge and landed a kick to the Hoods head and the mask cracked beneath his foot. When he landed, the Red Hood was sprawled on the ground. " _You're_ the one that's everyone is freaked out about?" He laughed. "Seems to me you should have seen that coming."

There came a groan as the Hood rose. He held his hands out to show he was unarmed and then unlatched his mask.

"Dick…"

It wasn't possible.

"I'm sorry…" Dick didn't listen, he just studied every line, every muscle of the man before him until he couldn't deny it.

It was Jason. He was older, there was a streak of white in his hair and a coldness in his eyes that hadn't been there before but… it was him. He was real.

"I wanted to-"

It didn't matter. Dick threw his arms around him.

"I'm so happy you're back."

-x-

"Behind you!" Dick cried as one of the cartel came up behind Jason with a lead pipe raised in the air.

Jason, entangled in a brawl, barely had time to duck as the pipe collided with his opponent and he whirled around to take out the second with a punch to his gut.

By the time they had cleared the room, Dick was fuming.

"You _need_ to start paying attention! Do you want to di-" A wave of guilt washed over him.

"You're right." Jason said quietly. Dick couldn't believe his ears. "I'll be more careful next time."

-x-

"What about this one?" Dick asked as he traced the scar from Jason's neck down to his chest.

When Jason had first come back, Dick had been ready to accept he wouldn't be same. And, in many ways, he wasn't. He was quiet now, less rash, and Dick listened to him scream in his sleep, every night. But it was still him. Somehow, someway, the small part that made Jason, Jason, had survived.

"Bar fight." Jason laughed.

Dick clutched him tight and brought the blankets above them. "How noble of you."

This had become a nightly occurrence, Dick would ask about one of Jason's scars, or burns, desperate to be connected to every new piece of him. And Jason didn't seem to mind. If anything, he seemed relieved. It was like, every time he finished, he waited for Dick to act disgusted, or disappointed, or finally realize that Jason wasn't the man he thought he was. But the moment never came.

"Do you think it's possible-" Dick grabbed Jason's hand. "To build something solid in a place as fucked up as Gotham?"

Jason hummed as he buried his face in Dick's neck. "That depends."

"On what?"

Jason smiled and kissed him. "Who you build it with."

-x-

"I'm sorry Jason." Bruce cleared his throat. "But Dick didn't survive. Lex Luthor smothered him before I could disarm the bomb that was attached to his heart."


End file.
